Still go my way (Nagasawa Nanako, blt graph. vol.52)

To jump high, you need to bend your knees and lower your body. You can say that the situation they are in right now is when they are crouching to take a leap. But what they face is a hill.

Last time, you said "A work that lasted more than 3 years is a lifework", for Nagasawa-san is Idol a lifework?

Nanako: Hm… Actually, the commitment isn't that strong. I wear outfits that they think suits me, I let the make-up artist handle my hairstyle and such. It might not be a good way of saying it but I have an easy feeling about it. There are discoveries such as "Oh, my atmosphere could change like this", and you could say that it's fun. Surprisingly, there are people who objectively see me, and they were right about me.  I could genuinely accept it. In fact, when I was a child I never said "Because I'm like this". I don't know if this can answer the question.

On the other hand, something that cannot be compromised. Is there anything that you'd like to carry out?

Nanako: I don't like seeing people who are angry or in a bad mood, so I try not to show those feelings in public. But there are unexpected times, right? That's why, say, even if there is something that really makes me mad, I'd think that if I get angry it's my loss and switched to another emotion. Aside from that… Working as an Idol, I try not to show much of my private life. When Watanabe Mayu-san was still a member of AKB, she didn't show much of her private life, and I think it's amazing how she can be so thorough. My ideal is to make people unable to imagine what kind of private life I have. In that sense, (fellow member Uemura) Rina is close to my ideal.

However, your job requires you to stand in public, and there are more and less opportunities to communicate, in this time of age it might be hard to completely wrap it under a veil.

Nanako: That's why at the very least I won't reveal "the truth" myself. If I see the "truth" of the Idols I like, I will feel disappointed so I thought that they can't see that. Though there are many things I'm concerned about…

You have high professionalism. Well then, what is something that you'd like to do in the current Keyakizaka46 system?

Nanako: If you mean as in my activity, I like live performances, so I hope we can perform in my hometown Yamagata. Although as always, I am bad at dancing (laughs). In last year's national tour's setlist, 2nd gen's dance track is also included, so stamina-wise I am quite able to balance it.

I see. Speaking of which, do you watch the live performance footage?

Nanako: Yes, I do. Though mostly when I am with members. It's not really related to what I mentioned earlier, but there are discoveries of things that I did not notice when I'm by myself like "Oh, so people also see those kinds of things", I like watching with someone else.

I see. What impressed you regarding the member's perspective?

Nanako: I think it's about the things related to dancing. Things like "This part here always has a different tempo", but they are looking at the finer details that I would miss if I were watching it alone, and then in the next practice I would remember how we have talked about the tempo. But last year, the number of times we have to perform without having all members present has increased…

Such changes happened. Half of "Fukyouwaon" front members have also left the group.

Nanako: It's lonely. There is only me left in "Nanachanzu (Nagasawa, Oda Nana, Yonetani Nanami)". "Hotokezu (Nagasawa, Nagahama Neru, Watanabe Rika)" too, Neru has graduated.

Recently the interaction between you, Rika-san and 2nd gen's Matsudaira Riko have increased, but is it always like that between you three?

Nanako: No, not at all. There are quite a number of times when we are with (Yamasaki) Ten-chan. Rather it was "Before we knew it we are already together~", I saw her sitting alone in a corner of a room, so I casually approached her and since then our distance has shrunk. She's really calm so you wouldn't think she's a 14 year old. But when we talk about things other than our activities, she really acts her age and that's cute. I mostly talk about my private matters with Pe-chan (Watanabe) and Ten-chan, to have them by my side when I want to reset my work mode by talking about nothing of importance soothes and saves me.

But in the first place, “Hotokezu” was not formed to gather soothing people like that, right?

Nanako: Yes, it feels like we have become together before we realized it. Of course when we need to seriously think about the group, we would enter the circle, but there are also “This is a good time, right?” kind of timing where we just relax.

I see. So… It’s not the main topic, but what will happen to Keyakizaka46 from now on?

Nanako: What will happen indeed, right? Truth is, I do feel anxious about it. I think that live performance will be different from before. But I think I am not the only one who has the feeling of wanting to put a stop into this situation where we don’t know what will happen, it’s something that we members share. We also want to perform new songs during the lives. We feel sorry to make the audience wait. There is also the sense of crisis that we can’t continue like this, and each member has the painful feeling of not being able to see what will happen next. But, I wonder if this is our time to be patient. Members who have individual work, me included, are doing our best there but since the change of the year our work as a group is pretty much only in “Keyakake (Keyaki tte, kakenai?)” so there is this sorry feeling of making the fans worry. And yet, we receive support from them through the mobame app, so we’d like to respond to it somehow.

You can be positive, knowing that there are people who believe and wait for you.

Nanako: Yes, that truly is. That’s why I see Keyakake as an important place more than ever before. I want to reassure the fans by properly tackling each and every job. I too, feel happy from seeing just a single picture from my favourite Idol posted in their blog or SNS, so I try not to forget to do the same and convey to them that “Naako is doing well”.

That’s wonderful. Based on that, what word would you use to describe your feeling of the current situation?

Nanako: “Hmmm…. I think it might be “sad”. Rather than me being sad, I feel sad from seeing how hard the members seem to be working, the many people who took the time and effort for us, and considering the feeling of the fans. Some people might be angry with the current situation, but I think that that anger will not make anyone happy, it would rather make them feel worse.”

What do you feel about members leaving the group?

Nanako: By coming back to the group, that means that each of them have found hope, to which I can say “They’ve come back”. But if they didn’t I can’t say anything about it, there is nothing that anyone can do about it. Eventually, you’d respect what they have decided themselves. It’s sad that the number of members is decreasing, but if I show how depressed I feel, I think that it will make those who support me sad too, so I try to look normal.

Asking this might be ambitious but I'll dare to try. Nagasawa-san, do you… love the group Keyakizaka46?

Nanako: Yes. If it were not for Keyaki, I won’t be who I am, I feel nothing but gratefulness. It is because I am Keyakizaka46’s Nagasawa Nanako, I am able to be a regular in “Ribbon”. I think that if this place named Keyaki doesn’t exist, I won’t be able to do anything. That’s why, I truly want to treasure it.

Hearing that… Somewhat makes me feel relieved.

Nanako: Even if we are at the bottom right now, I believe that this situation won’t go on forever, we can only go up from here. So I want to shake off all the things that cloud my mind, rearrange my stance and move forward. In fact, there is a part of me that is excited about what will happen to Keyaki from now on.

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translated by toomuchidea
qc by ariadne32391
raw @ weibo