Thanks (Sugai Yuuka, B.L.T2020 October)

 

I want to express the landscape beyond the negative emotions and conflicting feelings

Keyakizaka46 will be releasing their last single, “Dare ga Sono Kane ni Narasu no Ka?” on 21st August, the day that will mark the group’s 5th anniversary. With the last performance in October, they will close the curtain on that history. After that, they will be reborn under a new group name. It was announced by Sugai-san at the end of “KEYAKIZAKA46 Live Online, but with YOU!” on 16th July, but I think that there are various feelings. First of all, can you tell us how you felt about the group’s rename?

“There was an opportunity where the staff interviewed each member, and while we are talking about the future, there was a nuance that such a possibility exists… I thought that I hated it. After all, I had a strong feeling for the group named Keyakizaka46, so more than anything I feel disappointed. Because it felt like I was confronted with the reality that we couldn't continue as Keyakizaka46 without Techi (Hirate Yurina)... That’s why we had to do something as we wanted to continue as Keyakizaka46, and I talked with the members if there is any way we could do so. And with that, we weren’t able to make a clear distinction, but as we discussed with the staff, I felt that the way people see Keyakizaka have changed, and I come to be able to think positively of the name change, or so is the general course of events. Also, we were forced to refrain from our activities due to COVID, as I took a long hard look at the group and myself, and I was able to say a positive farewell to Keyaki and take the new step forward.”

So during stay-at-home period you faced the existence named “Keyakizaka46”, and able to review it

“That’s right. If it weren’t for COVID, as we planned to do a (4th debut) anniversary in April, we would be able to declare ‘From now on too we will continue as Keyakizaka46!’. The world itself is under pressure to change in many ways, and I began to think that change might be necessary for us as well. There were a lot of factors that came together into this decision, and the timing was such that I felt that choosing to rename would be a positive thing for the group in the future. I feel determined, so all that I need to do is say it during the MC session.”

I imagine that the members, especially the 1st generation who have been spinning the history of Keyakizaka46 since its formation, had some resistance to the name change, but how did they come into terms with it?

"With everyone in the 1st generation, it feels like we managed to overcome it by often saying “Only us can understand this feeling of frustration” and encouraging each other. However, it is not so easy to put an end into the 5 years we have spent together as Keyaki. There were many things that didn’t go as we wanted, and we had to endure it for a long period of time, so I had a very complicated feeling about it, but for better or worse, I wondered if the image of Keyakizaka would be a burden to the 2nd generation and the new 2nd generation who were going to work hard from now on. 

I thought that I don’t want to burden them with it, and I thought that we shouldn’t narrow our choices just based on the feelings of the 1st generation members. But after the online live performance, everyone in 2nd generation were crying, and I felt how they have a much stronger feelings for Keyakizaka than what I had imagined, and I feel sorry for it, but that’s why I want 2nd generation to spread their wings as much as they can without being bound by the name Keyakizaka46. In that sense, I am looking forward to seeing their future, including the new 2nd generation."

In fact, in the online live performance, some of the 2nd generation stood in the Center and showed their potential, didn't they?

“That’s right! Personally, I was really looking forward to (Yamasaki) Ten-chan's performance in “Otona wa Shinjite Kurenai”. I thought she is a girl with strong feelings to begin with, but the way she looked during the performance made me forget that she was 14 years old. I thought that I really want to protect her with great care.”

With the lyrics and worldview of that song, I felt that you were able to express a momentary atmosphere and a wistfulness by having the real middle teenager, Yamasaki-san, stand as the Center.

“I feel the same way. I'm glad that we were able to rely on Ten-chan to express the conflicts that are unique to adolescents. That’s why even if we become a new group in the future, I hope that we will still be able to express the traditional Keyaki-like style by featuring young members in songs based on the theme of teenagers' earnestness and anguish. Personally, I want to see that kind of performance."

We don't know what direction the group with the new name will take yet, but I honestly have a hope that it's a worldview that will add to what Keyakizaka46 has built up over the past five years.

“It's just a personal thought, but I think it's better not to reset it completely, but to power it up based on the past. However, I feel that the theme of negative human emotions and conflicts is settled with "Kuroi Hitsuji", so I would be happy if we could express more feelings that lie beyond those emotions and new scenes that spread out beyond them in the future.”

It can be said that there is the potential to become a group with a wide range of themes that can be expressed, and I have high hopes for this group.

“Thank you very much. It may be a little exaggerated, but I want to overcome various barriers in our future activities, and for someone to be able to sympathize with that challenge... I want to evolve as a group that can be an encouragement to others.”

Yes, I’m really looking forward to it! In that sense, everything was summed up in Sugai-san’s speech during the MC session of the online live performance, where you said "It will be a positive goodbye with Keyakizaka46”. Moreover, you chose your words very carefully. I'm sure it was the result of a lot of thinking and worrying about it, but can you tell us about the process you went through to arrive to what you said during the MC?

“It’s not until two days before the performance that I come up with the idea of talking in this way. Until then, I decided not to think so much about it, and to just say what I was feeling at the time.  However, when it came to the phrase "closing the curtain," I talked with the staff to make sure there were no discrepancies in their understanding of the phrase, and we reconciled them. But truly, until I reached the mood to say that MC, it was quite… I was feeling so down, the lowest I've ever since I entered Keyaki. 

There was a lot of self-restraint on top of that, and I was in a state of emotional turmoil, but there are the members who have went through a lot of hardships together with me for 5 years, and it’s all people who can understand each other, so being able to talk to everyone in the 1st generation on group LINE calls was a big deal. There were times when I stayed on the phone until the morning and ended up falling asleep (laughs), but I think I was saved by being able to hear everyone's feelings. Such a thing happened, and during the rehearsal period, I could feel everyone coming together as one, so I was able to speak very honestly about our feelings during the performance.”

Koike Minami-san told me of how after the performance ended Sugai-san said, “There was so much more I wanted to say, but there wasn’t enough time.” Did you feel that the time was short?

“Rather than that, after the MC, I feel worried that I wasn’t able to convey it properly. I couldn’t feel the audience’s feeling in real time, as it’s an audience-free online performance. I was worried that I was being one-sided, and the thought of ending Keyaki, which I love so much, made me think of many things. The song before the MC was “Garasu wo Ware!”, and I thought about it during the performance, and I changed my consciousness to “I have to concentrate!”... After talking too, I wonder if it’s not a way of speaking that gives someone goosebumps, I wonder if I should’ve shown more positivity, I wonder if I could convey our determination… It was pretty all over the place (laughs).”

But I could feel the struggle you were going through to make that decision, and every word you said had a lot of weight, and I think it was a great MC beyond measure.

“It helps me to hear you say that (laughs). But I always thought about how I should convey it. Also, I said to myself, "I'll probably cry when I have to say goodbye to Keyaki during MC, but I won't cry," and I was quite prepared for it, so I wonder if that’s why I somehow managed to. But as I was talking, the memories of the people who have been watching and supporting Keyaki came back to me and I started feeling “We must’ve pushed you around a lot”, and that almost made me cry. 

I thought that we didn’t respond well to their support, and that there must be a difficult time for them to watch over us, I feel sorry for it… However, that is why I feel deeply grateful to our fans, and I believe that we must be tied by something strong. For all the worries we’ve given them, I want to do my best so that we can laugh a lot together, and that feeling grows stronger day by day.”

Right, Sugai-san didn’t cry during the MC. When I think about the fact that you shed tears during your first one-man live performance at the Ariake concert in December of your debut year, I was deeply moved by how tough you have become.

“In order to make Keyakizaka46, which is very important to us into a lifetime treasure, the thought that I shouldn't be upset may have stopped me from crying. I realized that in order to deliver our thoughts with a strong will, we shouldn't cry. Of course, I wanted it to remain as something important within their heart, so while communicating it properly with the MC, I feel like I was able to switch my consciousness to deliver ‘Dare ga Sono Kane wa Narasu no ka?” that is our last song as Keyakizaka.”

Even in the last choreography of Darekane, it shows a positive farewell with Keyakizaka46.

“Yes. It means that after the Keyaki emblem is released, it will be put away in a box and kept for safekeeping.”

It’s perhaps a foolish question, but who’s going to ring the bell?

“I wonder who? (laughs). Seriously speaking, Darekane doesn’t have a Center position, it's a song that honestly expresses what we’re asking in the lyrics. There are many different interpretations of what the bell is referring to, but will the person who rings it is the person who stood in the center next? It’s just one interpretation, so you can take it however you like, and I'd rather leave it up to each and every one of you who listens.”

It's not an answer that only God knows, but that the right answer lies within each of us. However, as the Captain, you didn't just express your gratitude, you also had to take the brunt of the situation, didn't you? I wonder how you felt about that, to be honest.

 “Whenever something happened to the group, I had to explain to them properly, and I was aware that it was my job to do so. I was always trying to be honest with the fans, and that's how I really felt. I didn't feel that this was a burden for me, but rather I have a stronger feeling to convey it properly. But to be honest, I did feel a sense of responsibility when I told them that a member was leaving the group.”

Does that mean that if you had worked on something differently, there might have been a different future?

“I've tried to make the best choice for each time, but it's true that we've made the fans feel disappointed that the period where we couldn't work as long as we want lasted long… I felt nothing but sorry for that. Some of the members told me "You don't have to try to carry everyone's life on your shoulders". That's true, when you get down to it, it's each person's life, so it's up to each of us to decide what we'll choose in the end, and that made me feel a little better. I felt again that the members' thoughtfulness helped me a lot.”

I imagine that it may be difficult to put together a large group of girls, but what do you think about that?

“Some girls are sensitive, others are very careful, they can see the world around them better than others, and they can sense the words that are directed at them strongly, which makes them vulnerable, so I think about how I should support them. Especially for the teenage members, as I mentioned in the MC session during the performance, they must have been bothered by the "things that make you want to cover your ears". I was sad to see the negative things that were said about the group based on speculation, and it made me think, "Why do they say that? It wasn't like that at all!” and then I felt frustrated. But, we couldn't do activities that could overturn it, and I felt frustrated again. So, I think that in order to break that cycle, we are renaming.“

It's true that the announcement of the rename had a big impact, but I personally found it very frustrating that they only focused on that, and the evaluation of the online live performance took the back seat. I wanted them to properly report on the challenge that takes advantage of the online condition and the soulful performance.

“To tell the truth, we talked about it among ourselves. How all being talked about is the renaming. It seems that Director Nomura (Hiroki [野村裕紀], who has been directing Keyakizaka46's live shows since the early days of the group) was exploring various possibilities during the period when we couldn’t do any performance within corona situation, and he incorporated a wealth of ideas. We were also hungry for live performances, so we had a lot of passion from our mutual desire to express ourselves. 

On the technical side, they adjusted the movement between stages, calculated the camera work in detail, until the very last minute. Thanks to the help of so many people, we were able to concentrate on our performance. It was our first time performing with 28 members including the new 2nd generation members, but we were so determined to show and prove our strength in this live performance that we felt a great sense of accomplishment afterwards.”

Surely, it was a live performance that made me realize the high level of "fighting power" of the 28 members.

“I'm glad to hear you say that. But I felt again that we couldn't do the live performance by ourselves, and we needed so many staff members with us. The lighting staff who illuminated us dancing in the dark, TAKAHIRO-sensei and the dancers who taught us how to dance... There is no end to the list, we are here because of their love for Keyakizaka46.”

So I'm expecting to see something amazing at the last Keyakizaka live performance scheduled to be held in October. I don't mean to put pressure on you, though (laughs). Sugai-san, do you have a song that you personally want to perform?

“After all, I want to deliver “Silent Majority”. It’s Keyakizaka’s song of the beginning, and I love it… It’s a special song. Even now, there are times when I suddenly want to listen to it, and when I do I remember about various things. The coldness of the night air when the MV was shot, and even the smell of the scene are revived. 

In fact, I was one of the people who was saved by the lyrics, so I definitely want Saimajo to be put inside the setlist. But… I want to perform all the single title songs. Not only for ourselves, but also for our fans, we want to make a live performance where we can convince each other and take a step toward the next stage.”

I'm waiting for a live performance where I can feel like I've ascertained Keyakizaka46. Do you have any ideas or images of what you want the live performance to be like?

“Well… The composition and direction of the live performance is in the domain of professionals, so I have confidence in them, but… If we come up with an idea to make the live performance one that could convey our feelings, then I'd hope that they can take in some suggestions from the members as well. But I'm excited to have the live performance again, but when I think that this is the end of Keyaki, I have a complicated feeling that I don't want October both to come and not to come. Anyway, I want to spend the remaining time that we can call ourselves Keyakizaka with no regrets.”

Do you have an image of what you would like the group to be like after the name change?

“I don't have a concrete image yet, but I'm looking forward to the future because I don't know what's going to happen. However, I'd like to continue with our feelings towards music and our desire to express ourselves in Keyaki. We haven't been able to make songs from the very beginning with the 2nd generation and new 2nd generation members, so while working hard together to create a new landscape, we hope to pass on what we have learned in the past 5 years.”

That's right, even if the shape disappears, the "Keyaki-ism" does not decay...

“But I don’t want to be a presence that gets in the way, so that 2nd generation and new 2nd generation members can slowly be put in more focus (laughs)”

Does that mean you don't know if you will continue as Captain?

“Hmmm… That's not really the point, but when the group is about to change its name, I don't have to be the Captain if the future of the group isn't going to be brighter with me as the Captain. But personally, being able to do the group activities alone have been a lot of fun, so if I'm needed or if it's for the members’ sake, I'll do my best. There were a lot of times in the last two years or so where I wondered why things didn't work out so well, but because of that experience, I feel that I've been able to have the strength of mind to deal with anything that comes my way. The group itself had the mentality to face the stormy seas, so I think those days were not in vain, and it became a foundation that wouldn't crumble in the slightest. Because we had been facing headwinds for so long, I felt that our back was getting pushed even by a gentle tailwind (laughs).”

It's true that when I interviewed everyone individually, I felt that everyone became tougher.

“I get the impression that 1st generation members, in particular, have grown up over the past year or so. The way they think and the number of times I thought that they see the group objectively has increased. I feel a sense of reassurance with it.”

When I saw Watanabe Risa-san and Sugai-san talking during the interview for the last B.L.T. June issue, I thought that you made a great pair.

“Yes, Risa and I talk a lot, and last year we even went out for a meal together. We had a meal together last year, on the day before the Record Award, we talked about various topics, from deep conversations to funny ones. I don't want to say it openly, but I guess Risa had a hard time too...  But I think she's working with the awareness of leading the group now. I think it's a difficult position with expectations from the people around, but after accepting it, she looked forward firmly. That's how I feel when I see her up close and personal.

Sugai-san, too, you've become very reliable over the past five years.

“I wonder if I grew up? (laughs). But as I go through various experiences, when I manage to achieve my goals, I feel like I've grown up a little bit, but it's another thing whether I realized it or not. Performing is a set of evaluation, but when the response is great and the words of encouragement come through, it is a great source of energy. Especially when my heart was shattered, the encouragement I received from them was like a scab in my heart, reinforcing the parts that had been shattered. It is thanks to that, now many parts of it have become sturdy. 

My riding skills were not so good, and I’m not so good at studying either… My confidence was getting lower and lower. There was a time where I had fun, but I couldn’t genuinely laugh. I might be spoiling myself but I guess I'm blessed to have great opportunities, so when my hard work doesn't lead to a direct outcome, I just lose my confidence and cry in bed night after night... (laughs). Keyaki gave me a chance to change myself, and I still think that my family and friends' happiness through my activities is my driving force.”

It's not really appropriate to ask this right now, but what is the member's presence for you?

“Normally when you take a group photo, you would come closer to the center, wouldn’t you? But Keyaki members are the type of girls who would go toward the both sides at the end (laughs). They are friendly once you open your hearts and befriend them, but it takes time to get to know each other and there are some quirky children in this group. But I think that's why it was so interesting. It's a little late now, but I'd like to hear what criteria they used to select us. Also, there are a lot of 2nd generation and new 2nd generation members make up for what we lack in 1st generation members, which I think is interesting. In that sense, it's a bit of a miraculous coincidence for us, so I'd like to continue to complement and help each other.”

 I only hope that the members will be able to enjoy their activities in a happy way.

“It’s just exactly as you say, and I feel like this is just the beginning. Based on what we've done so far, I'd like us to expand the possibilities and show everyone something new, something that might surprise them and make them think, "I didn't know there was this side of them that I hadn't seen before!”.”

I’ve been asking a lot of “Jonetsu Tairiku [A documentary TV series]” like questions, but what is Keyakizaka46 for Sugai Yuuka?

“Well, it's difficult to say... But when I think back on it, it was a sparkling 5 years, really. I feel sad when I think that I might forget it one day with the flow of time, a lot of it has been put on footage, but there are things that I can only do now. When I think about it, "youth" is perhaps the best word to describe it… Probably, I'll remember my days in Keyaki at the end my life... It's certainly a very important and profound moment in my life, I can't forget it.”

But it's not the 'end = period' yet. I'm thinking that the upcoming name change is a 'break = comma'.

“Oh, that's kind of a fancy way of putting it (laughs). But I truly want to work hard and make a new flower bloom. Our talent is limited, but our efforts are infinite. By doing so, I want to repay the people who have been supporting us for a long time. I'm glad if they can accept our renaming with excitement rather than an anxiety, and I hope we can continue to share the same feelings and create a brighter future together.”

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Translation: toomuchidea

QC: kiryu

Raw: karl_k46