Kobayashi Yui interview with FRAU 22 September 2022
The new frontier of “idols who don’t smile”
She has always been aware of her shyness, speaking in a gentle tone with a humble personality. She’s not the type to talk about herself with confidence, but it seems that her 2nd PB “Igaisei” has given her a positive feeling as “the expressive Kobayashi Yui”.
“In my first PB, I was able to take pictures that I could only have taken in my teens. More than three years have passed since then, and since I was given the opportunity to release a 2nd PB, I took it on with the desire to show how much I have grown as a model. Being an exclusive model for “with” has broadened the range of my expressions and posing, and in fact with the many different sides of myself I’ve shown, I think it has turned out into a photobook worth seeing, if I do say so myself (laughs).”
In a picture taken in the majestic nature of Yakushima, she shows an innocent, unrestrained smile. Drawn by her happy aura, an unexpected guest also made an appearance.
“I took a picture with a cat that I happened to meet on Yakushima. Perhaps because it was a friendly cat, it looked at the camera cooperatively when being photographed. It wasn’t edited, and it wasn’t an “actor cat” either (laughs). It was so cute and I love cats, so it kept my excitement up. Other than that, when we were shooting on the beach, there was a huge puddle that had formed from the rain the day before, and I was able to take a fantastic shot with the sky reflected in the water. It was truly a series of good luck.”
When shooting her 1st photobook as a 19-year-old, she was frantic in trying to meet the photographer’s requests. She wasn’t used to doing her activities solo, but that greenness of hers was also her weapon. Now that she is 22, she has become able to express her playfulness according to the situation.
“I bit into one of the delicious-looking cherries that were prepared for us on the shoot, and it ended up being used as the cover photo of the regular edition (laughs). There were also pictures taken of me in my own clothes, and I was free to do whatever I wanted to depending on the situation. I was surrounded by staff members that I had worked with many times before on “with” magazine, so it was easy for me to exchange opinions with them, and I think I was able to relax and show my true self.”
The ease of mind she gained through her hiatus
Since her debut, Kobayashi Yui-san has continually given fierce performances of songs with intense choreography. In 2020, she narrated the video announcing the new group name and proclaimed, “Let’s run up a new slope. Freely, in our own way.” She is the group’s tower of strength, trusted by members and fans alike, and has built up a stoic impression of herself. That is why even an innocent smile from her is able to make people feel her “unexpectedness”.
“Personally, it’s not that I decided not to smile to protect my image. But there were a lot of people who had an impression of me being cool from watching the live performances, and were surprised to see me smiling in the handshake events. Something like, “It was unexpected to see Yuipon wearing cat ears” (laughs). It makes me a bit happy to see those kinds of reactions. Rather than being defined as a certain kind of person, I want to be told “That’s unexpected from you”. I want to constantly change, and I’d like to continue showing the many different sides of myself.”
To enjoy her work with a flexible mindset, without thinking too much of it. The reason she was able to mature as an idol was because she thoroughly faced herself during her hiatus last year.
“Last year, by being able to take a break from work, I feel that I’ve been able to give myself more breathing room mentally. In the past, when I didn’t get the result that I wanted at work or when I made a mistake, I was the type who would blame myself and dwell on it for days. By trying to get closer to my ideal self, thinking that “I have to be like this!”, I was digging my own grave… But lately, I’ve been able to think “Oh well” instead. I've started to shift my way of thinking to one that allows me to maintain a healthier and humane self. I feel like I have gained a sustainable self that I can keep doing the work I love with for a long time to come.”
By stepping away from work and freeing herself from the pressure that she has put on herself, her perspective on the group and vision for the future also changed.
The reason why she chose to take a break from work for the first time
Before making her debut as a 15-year-old, she never had any experience in singing or dancing. She wasn’t the type to use that as an excuse, and has always stoically honed her skills with the aim of reaching perfection. Her efforts did not betray her. With the group’s sharpest dance moves as her weapon, she performed “Ambivalent” at 2018’s Japan Record Award at the center position. She also centered the “Garasu wo Ware!” performance in NHK Kouhaku Uta Gassen of the same year, and amidst the growing attention, she released her first photobook “Kanjou no Kouzu” in the following year.
For Kobayashi Yui, earning a new job was “a reward for her hard work”
“Whenever I felt discouraged, I would motivate myself by thinking, “If I do well on this job, another job like this might come along”. I definitely wanted to live up to the expectations and carry it over to the next job, and I thought that I needed to do everything perfectly to do so… and so I think I was always mentally strained. But entering 2020, there was a time when things weren’t going as planned with work due to the COVID pandemic, which made me feel even more strongly that I needed to do my best, but my body gradually couldn’t keep up. I began feeling like I wasn’t in good shape more often.”
In September 2021, her hiatus was announced. It was the first time that she stopped of her own volition on the road that she had been hell-bent on running down all this time.
“Until then, I had never taken a day off work nor had I missed a single handshake event, so I was worried that something important might fall apart if I took a hiatus… Even so, I decided to take a break because I felt that it would be somewhat wrong to continue my activities while I was not in good shape all the time. I thought it was perhaps necessary for me to take a rest now so I’d be able to devote myself more fully to my activities in the future.”
Becoming able to forgive herself even if she failed after all her efforts
What she gained from stepping away from work was the ability to think “Oh well, whatever”. She stopped blaming herself unreasonably on days when she couldn’t deliver perfect results. And on days when she feels off, she has learned to rely on the members around her and to let them spoil her. In variety shows, she has become comfortable with making comments without restraint and getting retorted by her juniors, and her charm as someone to be teased has begun to blossom.
“Ever since we started anew as Sakurazaka46, the 2nd generation members have been at the forefront of creating the group’s new image, and I have come to find it rewarding to support them from behind the scenes. Before that point, there were times when I couldn’t forgive myself for letting others pamper me, but now, even if I were to have days like that, I’d think, “Ah, whatever” (laughs). The renaming has allowed the 1st gen members and 2nd gen members to unite beyond the differences in when we joined the group, and I really sense that the atmosphere of the group has improved.”
”I wasn’t able to join Sakurazaka46’s first national tour because my decision to take a hiatus, but the 2nd generation members who stepped in to perform in my position gave wonderful performances. I think it was a good opportunity for the members to broaden their perspectives and improve their skills from experiencing the role of standing in the front. As for myself, rather than feeling worried that my position would be taken away from me, I felt hope that the group would be strengthened as a whole. It feels as if I have reached a new stage as an idol in coming to feel this way.”
After her hiatus, the rewards she sees for working hard have also changed.
During my hiatus, I went on a trip with my family for the first time since my idol debut. I also had a lot of time to meet my friends, and I was able to make plans to go out on my days off and use them as motivation to work harder. I learned the importance of having something to look forward to outside of work in order to continue my activities with positivity for a long time to come.
“That being said, what I have always kept in mind since my debut is to do my best to achieve the very best I can in the job before me. I don't think that will change in the future either. I will never say “Oh, whatever” as an excuse to give up on trying or abandon something I should be doing half-heartedly (laughs). But if I’ve given it my very best effort, I will forgive myself even if I fail. These days, even if I make a mistake, I can laugh about it and move on. I think that this is a really major change.”
She has no plans to graduate
When she released her 1st PB, she was stoically forcing a lot of pressure on herself. If she were to speak with herself from back then, what would she say?
“I’d say, “It’s okay to slow down”. Though I don’t know if she would listen to me (laughs). Ever since my debut, I have been working hard to overcome the hurdles that I set for myself, like “I must achieve this within X years”. I think I have been able to grow because of that, but now I've come full circle and I haven’t set any goals or plans for the future. If I think “I must do this!”, I may end up narrowing my own possibilities. And the shock that comes with not achieving said goals is also substantial. On the other hand, if I’m flexible about it and take an 'anything goes' stance, I may find myself with more opportunities and discover a new and unexpected side of myself.”
While she has a wealth of experience, she is still just 22 years old. She is not thinking ahead, so of course, she doesn't have any plans to graduate from the group either.
”Many 1st gen members graduated this past year, so there are perhaps some people who are worried about that aspect of things, but at the moment I truly have no plan [to graduate] (laughs). While there are lots of things that I want to do, rather than going in a fixed direction, I'd like to simply enjoy the work that I’ve been offered. I think there is still a lot of room left for me to show everyone something unexpected.”
Attracting attention with her worldview that sets her apart from conventional idols in both her music and costumes, Kobayashi Yui is still renewing herself. The way she continues to discover new sides to herself and live a resolute yet flexible way of life may serve as a role model for women living in today's world.
“These days, people are becoming more accepting of those who act in calculated ways, and conversely, people who are frank and direct are also being seen as more attractive. The image of women that people consider ideal is really diversifying. I would be glad if I could be a source of courage to women who are finding it hard to feel confident about themselves, by showing them more and more surprising sides to myself. “I feel at ease when I look at Yuipon”, it would be great if I could make them feel that way.”
Comments
Post a Comment