Seki Yumiko solo interview in Bessatsu Kadokawa Keyakizaka46 / Sakurazaka46 1013/1209
In the after-live stream after the last live performance, the second generation member, Seki Yumiko, said "Even if I were to be born again, I want to be in Keyakizaka". The girl who said it unconsciously had always liked idols and had participated in Keyakizaka46’s handshake event. Her love for the group has deepened even more as a member of the group than it was back then, when she watched their activities as a fan about three years ago. It is because the group Keyakizaka 46 helped her grow up.
“Until I joined Keyakizaka 46, I couldn't even say 'I've worked hard on this' on anything I do at all; I was just living an ordinary life. But meeting the seniors and fellow second generation, It was my first time experiencing an environment where there are so many people around me who are working so hard. I didn't realise it when I was on the outside (of Keyakizaka46), but they were working really hard in rehearsals before releasing songs or before standing in front of fans at live shows. I felt like I had to work harder than ever before when I saw that, and for the first time in my life I wanted to give it my all because I love this group.”
She, who came to the group with both big expectations and anxiety. The joys and hardships she stuck through her activities are all things that she would never have known existed when she was just watching them as a fan. Even as she began her activities as a member, there was a period of time when she, somewhere in her heart, couldn’t feel the confidence that she was part of Keyakizaka46.
“About five months after I joined, we had our third year anniversary live in Osaka. When I got to stand on the stage for the first time with my seniors, there I realized that ‘I'm in Keyakizaka46’ and that ‘I'm one of the members’”. Until then, truly, I couldn’t think of myself as one of the ‘members’. At that live there many things I was to do, and that was when I could for sure feel the ‘feeling’ of a performance, and when I felt I could stand on stage."
To join an already perfected group after its formation, it takes time for her to communicate heart to heart with her seniors. She had always admired them, but it was not so easy to get close to them.
“It was at ‘Keyaki Republic 2019’ that I felt that I could talk frankly to the first generation naturally. Since it was an outdoor live concert, we all ran around the stage with all our might, and then had a barbecue after the concert. There we could talk to each other little by little. It was more than half a year after we joined the group, and I felt that we got closer to each other after that live show.”
Not only the distance between fans and members, the live performance in an open atmosphere also brought the members' hearts closer together. And in that Keyaki Republic, she can feel her own self change little by little.
“Until then, all I could think about was to fit in, not be obtrusive, and to not be an annoyance to other members by being in the wrong place. I couldn't look at them in the face, and I didn't have the time to think about how to express the songs. But since that Keyaki Republic, I think I've been able to enjoy doing live shows. Until then, it was all new to me, but slowly I got used to performing live and being on stage with my seniors. I think that's when I finally felt at ease.”
The reason she was able to feel at ease is because of her friends who were in the same environment, and a big mutual encouragement. The support and help from each other from the second generation made her want to work harder. And she wanted to be able to help her friends too.
“I'm the type of person who doesn't tell people about my problems, so I tend to keep it to myself. But the second generation would notice that one way or another. And during that, I feel like I want people to listen and often it makes my heart feel cleared up having them listen to me. They notice those little changes, and I also notice their little changes.”
Because there were times when there’s only the first generation, the sentiment of “21 members in Keyakizaka46” must have been strong for them and the people around them. But as it was a miracle that the group was formed with 21 members, she feels it was also fate that 9 members were chosen as the second generation.
“I don't think it would have been possible if even one of us was missing, and also because of these nine people I think we've done our best to get to this point. The day after the decision of who was signed to Keyakizaka46, that day was my first artist photo shoot, and the atmosphere when the second generation got together right then and now doesn’t change. I think we got along well with each other from the beginning because we had a similar vibe. And I'm the type of person who is shy around strangers, but from the first time we met, I could talk to the second generation naturally.”
Even though the vibe is still the same, the bond has deepened as they walked through ups and downs together. Things like responsibility, pressure, and frustration that each of them developed through their experience on the group's activities are different. Yet she still wanted to make Keyakizaka46 better and her desire to be the power of it was still the same.
“At first, I think we all felt like we’re friends. It’s just fun to be together. But as I experienced things like live shows, handshakes, TV recordings, I became able to not only get along with them, but also be able to speak my opinion properly and say 'isn’t this wrong?' for the sake of the group and ourselves. The atmosphere hasn't changed, but the relationship has changed a bit, and now I feel like we've gone from being friends to being comrades.”
Keyakizaka46’s songs were basically composed to match the formation of 21 members from the first generation. The vacant spot left by graduating and retreating members was filled by the second generation and the 21 members formation never changed. However, there were 9 vacant positions in the last live. Whether it’s accidentally or inevitably, every second generation member was able to participate in most of the songs.
“I think we’ve done it. The setlist on both days were completely different, we performed a lot of songs, and there the second generation were able to participate in most of the songs. Until then it would be normal for someone to watch without being among the 21 people, I was really happy that we were able to perform together on the stage.”
It felt like she was finally able to be on the stage as “Seki Yumiko” instead of her senior (as substitute). Because the pressure was so great, the joy of being able to participate in each and every song was greater than ever before.
“Especially when I was able to participate in ‘Fukyouwaon’ for the first time. I felt a deep emotion dancing in that costume. Because it’s an important song for me and the group as well, I felt pressured, but during the show all I could think was to move my body frantically like ‘in any case, just do it’ and ‘I have to give my all’”.
Before D-day, they had about 3 weeks of rehearsal. Although many songs are new to the second generation, they learnt the choreography, formation, and (stage) direction in a short period of time quickly. Even though it seems difficult or impossible, it was necessary to create the best performance possible.
“We had to choreograph around 7 songs a day for around 3 days one after another, we all felt like our heads were about to explode as we struggled to remember them. Because the venue was so big, it was really hard to grasp how to move during the song and where to move next. But the second generation all encourage and help each other like ‘because we all can participate together, let’s do our best’. Because (Morita) Hikaru and (Takemoto) Yui both learn so fast, I learnt a lot from them.”
In order to decorate the Hanamichi (TL: honourable end to a career) as Keyakizaka46, they improved their (dance) accuracy while helping each other complete their daily rehearsals. Cited that songs which she particularly struggled with are “Te wo Tsunaide Kaerou ka” and “Sajin”. She reveals how it was through these 2 songs that she learned of her shortcomings.
“I think ‘Te wo Tsunaide Kaerou ka’ is a song you learn with your head more than with your body. It’s difficult to learn the moves, and it seems that I just can’t remember them… Also, ‘Sajin’ was difficult. The last chorus of this song is choreographed like a mix of the first and second chorus. If it’s choreographed differently, it would be easier to remember. But because it’s mixed, it went like ‘huh? Which should I dance next?’ (laughs).”
The two days of live performance were completely different from each other in terms of both music and direction, with the group's "calmness" and "movement" mesmerizing to the audience. Also MC is almost non-existent, the girls solely continued singing and dancing. The view from her position and the memories of the members remain strong with the song.
“On the first day, I liked the direction of ‘Student Dance’ where the members took a camera and photographed each other. I thought they all looked like they enjoyed performing that song. On the second day, we played ‘Abunakkashii Keikaku’ as the first song, which was really fun from the beginning, because it was a very exciting song that lifted my spirits. Normally, I would have heard fans shouting, so I was lonely there, but I knew they would be watching in front of the screen, so I enjoyed it with all my heart while imagining them.”
Even though they were performing without an audience, there were many times when she felt her fans watching through the screen. The desire to deliver to the fans behind the camera made the girls move forward. And as they continued to perform, they developed emotions that were not present in the rehearsals.
“Because the first day has a setlist filled with so-called ‘the’ Keyakizaka46 songs, as usual, I tried to figure out how to express this song, and also how to convey the meaning of its lyrics. But on the second day, there were a lot of exciting songs. So, I made a lot of eye contact with the members, and when I saw them performing happily, I quickly felt the emotion from thinking about it, ‘ah, so this is the last time we can perform this song’. On that day, even though it was fun, it was also pretty sad.”
In particular to that feeling, “Futari Saison” is often cited by members as a song they have an emotional attachment to. The shaken expression by the members’ graduation, but also their strongly shaken hearts.
“As this was the last live for the first generation, Sato Shiori, she cried during ‘Futari Saison’. At that time, because the stage was so bright and everyone could see her face clearly, her feelings quickly got to everyone. The song itself has sadness in it, but I felt it more than usual, and I almost cried too at that time.”
In each of everyone’s expressions and tears, the thoughts they put into the songs, those can really be felt that this is the last live for Keyakizaka46. Even outside of their main show, these moments being the last can truly be felt.
“Before live, we always form a circle (to cheer before the show) with everyone, but Sugai (Yuuka)-san and members are saying things like, ‘will we do it!?’ and ‘can we do it!?’ longer than usual. There I hadn’t felt it yet, but Tamura Hono, who was next to me, said, ‘so this is the last cheer, eh’. With those words, suddenly I felt down and before the show I almost cried. Thinking about it now, Sugai-san’s (cheering) shout was more than usual, like making sure of our feelings. I knew there was something unusual about it.”
In the last live, a members’ history video was played. On the second day, a video of the second generation was played, and on the live stream showed the girls forming a circle and illuminated by the video while they were going to hold each others’ hands bit by bit. As if the girls are intersecting and become one, then and now.
“Originally, really it was just about gathering together and forming a circle facing outwards. But during the show, we just naturally held hands together. At that time, I felt really nostalgic while watching the video. Also feeling the warmth of everyone’s hands recalled everything we’ve done up to this point in an instant, ‘ahh, we’ve overcome a lot of things as a group of nine.’”
Soon after the last live, all of the members reappeared on stage with Sakurazaka46 costumes. Then, with powerful expressions they went up the ‘hill’ (hill-like stage) together. Up to that point, it wasn’t easy to accept the end of the group.
“When I heard of the name change, I was surprised and as expected, I felt a great sadness. The memories I have since my entry to Keyakizaka46 were very strong, and because I have an emotional attachment to the name, many times I felt sad during performance, saying things like, ‘so today is the last day I can introduce myself as Keyakizaka46.’ I know that members and the environment won’t change, but I can’t accept that we won’t be Keyakizaka46 again, and I think there were lots of things that I felt a bit negative about.”
When you think about it as the end of your beloved group, or its disappearance, you are left with nothing but a feeling of helplessness. But if you think of it as a new beginning for the group, you can think positively about how you want to renew your attitude and what you need to do to make it happen.
“I didn't have the chance to do so, but after seeing the members around me working hard and spending time with them, I felt that I shouldn’t keep the same feeling if I wanted to make a new start, and I wanted to try again. There were times when I cried during the live, but at the end when I walked towards the gate in those new Sakurazaka46 costumes, I couldn’t cry anymore. I felt like moving forwards together with them.”
At the end of the second day, Sakurazaka46's debut song "Nobody's Fault" was performed in surprise. The song, basing itself on the strength of Keyakizaka46, was decorated with new members’ determination, and gave us anticipation for a bright beginning. How did she see the first (Sakurazaka46’s) song performed on stage?
“The music feels a bit Keyaki-like, there’s a strength in the music composition. I was looking at it thinking, ‘I really like it as it’s not so-idol in a good way. Besides, my fellow generation Morita Hikaru is the center, which made me really happy as a fellow second generation. (Morita) standing in the middle was really cool.”
Seki talks of how she talks about her dreams with her fellow generation mates, and what she has started thinking of about herself. She has grown up a lot since she joined the group, a time when she had no confidence; and continues to think about how to get Sakurazaka46 to move forward and what kind of dreams she has as a member of the group.
“Keyakizaka 46 is hard to be approached in both good and bad ways, I think it has a mysterious feel to it, and it has become like a brand in some ways. It also has the power to make you want to just watch them, rather than trying to support them. But in Sakurazaka46, we want to be a group that is closer to our fans and a friendlier group. Anyways, now I just want to convey my gratitude to all of you. Recently, I’ve been talking about the group with every second generation. We’re not Keyakizaka46 anymore, but we'll be standing on a new start, but we’re thinking about how to go up and beyond from here.”
Because there are others who think the same about the group, the dreams never end. Of course they want to accomplish more with Sakurazaka46 than with Keyakizaka46.
“It might be a big goal, but I think it will be great if we can be a group known to people abroad and befriend them. Right now, I don’t know how many people abroad know about us also whether they are happy about it. But with these members, we can go to further places where we were never seen as Keyakizaka46. I want to see more and more views with our fans.”
When asked about what she would like to do personally, her answer was “model”. To have this dream, she says she was influenced by her admired senior, Habu Mizuho.
“Habu-san, who is a model, is really cool. Besides that, I think there are a lot of lovely things about Habu-san as a person. As I noticed lately, there are many people normally who can't say something out of fear that they will be disliked, but Habu-san can point out reliably what’s wrong with the other person. The reason for that is because she really thinks about that person. I’m often pointed out about my hunched back (laughs), but also because she sees me and says that for me, that I think I’m really grateful for that. Also when I said, ‘I want to be a model’, she warmly said ‘You can do it!’. I want to be a person as strong and as kind as Habu-san. Then, I think I’ll be happy if someday I could be part of the reason people know about Sakurazaka46 just like my seniors did.”
Many are surely attracted to the slender, tall, and charming features. Wondering that her dream will soon come true, that is how she sets her goal tightly as a group, and also as an individual; and tries to push herself forwards more and more. The reason why her avid motivation is overflowing and proceeds to walk straightforwardly is because she feels the existence of her fans around her, who will follow her anywhere at any time.
“Because of the current situation, we can’t meet in person. But, on mobame I’ve received a lot of supporting words from fans, like ‘Even as Sakurazaka46 I’ll support you’ and ‘I was happy to see a lot of second generation performing on last live’. It becomes a great strength for me, having them to see me and to say those words. That’s why I want Sakurazaka46 to become a group that can deliver our gratitude to our fans.”
The interaction with her fans gives her strength. Even in this situation where they couldn’t meet in person, she can express her gratitude for her fans in ways she can. She says live shows are the most exciting part of her activities. Being able to interact with fellow members and fans is a big driving force for her.
“In live, it’s really fun to not only create things together with the members, but also to communicate with the fans. It’s complicated to be in venues now, but I hope we have the chance to be seen live as Sakurazaka46 in person soon.”
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